You won't be his first, his last, or his only. He's loved before, and he will love again ... But if he loves you now, what else matters ? He's not perfect and neither are you, which both of you will never be. But if he makes you laugh, at least once causes you to think twice, and he admits to being human and to making mistakes, hold on to him and give him all you've got. He's not going to quote poetry, and he isn't going to be thinking about you every single moment of every single day, but he will give you a part of him, that he knows you can break. Don't hurt him, don't change him, don't expect too much from him. But smile when he makes you happy, cry when he makes you sad, and miss him when he's not there with you ...

PS : I Miss You ..

I miss you when something really good happens, 

because you're the one I want to share it with.

I miss you when something is troubling me,

because you're the one who understands me so well.

I miss you when I laugh and cry,

because I know that you are the one that makes my laughter grow, and my tears disappear.

I miss you all the time,

but I miss you the most when I lay awake at night, 

and think of all the wonderful times that we spent with each other, 

for those were some of the best and most memorable moments of my life ...

Live the Dream ...

Have you ever woken up to the morning sunshine

And still not felt the warmth?

Ever felt that the fire you had inside

Somehow just got lost?

Do you remember your childhood days,

When dreams used to light up your way?

Did you grow up just to lose it all?

And watch it disappear in the haze?

Burying those times, as life moved on

You chose the beaten track

Missing out on what you want

Can you say you've never looked back?

So just this once, wake up to be who you want

And pave the path yourself

Dare to chase those dreams you saw

Bear a heart with no regrets

Let yourself fly azure

Above thriving fields and golden sands

And far above, feel the heavens bow

As you decide to take the chance

Live your life, live it now

Let your choices guide you

And let the inferno of your passions

Leave a blazing trail behind you...

~M

....

So I am finally going to have a blog entry that's not centered around my ntu life or my (non existent) love life. This one's about someone way more important - my grandmother. I lost my grandmother over a month ago, while I was still in ntu. For the first time in 20 years, I didn't get a call from her on my birthday. I thought I'd talk to her when I was back in Delhi, except it was too late by then.

If there's one thing I've always been afraid of, since the day I decided to leave for Sg, its a situation like this. I don't mind missing my cousins weddings, or the birth of my nieces and nephews - you get to make up for that when you're back. Four months really isn't that long. And there's always mobile phones and webcams and skype. But for something like this, you cant make up for it. Ever.
Had I known back in January that it was the last time I was meeting her ... well, I don't know, it would have been different.

I still remember those times when she used to wait for me at the bus stop. No matter the scorching heat or the peak cold, I could always see my grandmother's smiling face as I stepped down from my school bus.

And whenever I went to visit her, even before we reached, she'd be toiling in the kitchen preparing something special for her granddaughter who met her once in four months.
Don't get me wrong. I am glad she didn't suffer at the end. And given her precarious medical condition, I think its all for the best.

But it still gives me an empty feeling when I walk into her room or when I look at her photo in my drawing room. A feeling that makes me realise she's really gone. Makes me realise just how much I miss her ...

Happy Birthday ...

“... and somewhere in between all our long talks, and crazy jokes, and stupid fights, and random arguments ...”